If tears could burn a trail
by justformemories
Summary: A couple of one-shots into the life of Bella and Paul, no real plot line, more like memories, not day to day.
1. The eyes will follow

"umphf" she said as she rolled to her back in bed. She refused to open her eyes, another day, another class, another day of work. It was a never ending cycle. Bella grunted as she sat up ad yawned. Stretching her arms over her head she ran through her to do list for the day. She always wondered why she did that, she never really got much of her list done anyways.  
"Need to do laundry..." she mumbled as she climbed out of bed. Pulling on her jeans and a shirt, she grabbed her hoodie as she shuffled down the stairs. Mumbling she pushed the "brew" button on the coffee machine. Walking over, sipping her coffee, Bella checked her email, avoiding the fact that she needed to head out to school. It wasnt that she hated school, but she always had a rough time getting up in the morning. By the time she was up and going she knew the type of day she was going to have and usually it ended up being a pretty good day, today though...today just seemed different. She wasnt sure why and didnt bother to analyze it. Tossing the rest of the contents of her cup into the sink she walked to front door, grabbing her purse and boots along the way.  
As she was walking to her car she could feel eyes on her. Looking around she saw nothing and continued to get into her car and drive to the campus.

-

He tossed his black hair back ad ran his tan fingers through it. He couldnt figure out how to approach her. He'd met her once or twice before but couldnt figure out how to approach her again. "Hi, I'm in love with you? I'm going to be with you forever." Shaking the thoughts from his head he just sat back in his chair. Nothing like this had ever gotten to him before and he wast sure why it matter so much now. Why couldnt this just happen naturally? Oh wait...it had happened naturally, or as naturally as it could in his world.  
He watched Bella sit at the table down from him, munching on a sandwich of some sort. He'd seen her in class, talked to her once and that was it. Finally, after gathering his courage, which shocked him as he always saw himself as pretty badass and up for a challenge, he walked over to Bella, pulled the chair out from across her and sat down.  
"Hey Bella. Hows it going?" Paul asked. She barely looked up, making him twitch a little.  
"Hey Paul. Fine. Did you understand the homework? I feel like I'm the only person who still isnt catching on." She gave him the smallest smile, confused as to why the hottest guy that she had personally ever seen was talking to her. She'd seen him around campus. Black tight shirt, black jeans and black boots which looked like they could take anyone out with one kick. She'd also seen the looks everyone seemed to give him, especially the women.


	2. Dancing in the kitchen

He walked quietly into the kitchen and saw her body swaying. He smiled. He loved watching her when she thought no one was around. She had a spoon in her mouth, humming some tune that was playing in her head, swaying her hips to the same tune. She was waiting for something in the microwave. He knew he must have been grinning like a fool. He liked her this way, carefree, moving her hips, singing...she did this when she was cleaning or in a really good mood. He looked around, not seeing any cleaning products or trash bags; "must be a good mood" he smiled to himself.  
Slowly he moved behind her, deftly moved his fingers down her a jolt Bella jumped back, clearly on guard again. "-the hell!" she croaked. She turned and faced paul, shock and horror on her face, but it melted away to embarrassment and smacked at paul's large muscled arm, looking straight into his deep brown eyes. "Paul, you jerk!" she moaned, "I didnt even hear you come in" she playfully shoved at him again.  
"That was the objective" he laughed, pulling her close and kissing her hard. He loved watching her blush, even more so when he was the cause.  
"So, how long were you there?" bella sighed, man those lips of his were evil, she could never be mad for long when he kissed her or even when he gave her that pouty look of his.  
"Long enough." He flashed her a smile. "Having a good day? How was class?" he held her close.

-beep, beep- -beep, beep- stated the microwave, interrupting them.

"Good" she started, pulling her food out of the microwave. "Good...just, ya know...math was a bit rough." she continued to ramble on and taking bites of her hot food.  
"Rough?"  
"Yeah...I seriously considered throwing the computer out of the second story window...it seemed like everything was backwards...just so frustrating!" she muttered, putting down the plate and and wiping her hand on her jeans. "I mean I know going back to finish this degree is a big deal...but damn!" she moaned to herself "there better be a big damn present for finishing! Besides a stupid piece of paper I mean..." she grunted out. It wasnt that she didnt appreciate the hard work she was doing but sometimes she felt it was worthless. It would barely make a dent in her paycheck but it would look better on her resume, if she ever considered leaving her current job or moving up in the company.  
"Its just...when am I going to use it?" she muttered.  
"Well...when your giving discounts?" paul answered. Bella shot him a look. "I take it I wasnt supposed to answer that?" grinning at her bewildered face. Bella sat there stunned. "Really paul? I mean I know when I'll use it.."she stamped her foot. She was stammering! "You jerk!" she smacked his arm again and felt his laugh erupt from his chest.  
"What? I just love watching you babble, you do it so well!" he stepped back, avoiding another slap, not like it felt like anything to him, more like a feather hitting his skin. There was the blush again, he laughed.


	3. You don't get to be sorry

"NO PAUL! YOU DONT UNDERSTAND WHAT I'VE BEEN THROUGH!" Bella shoved at him, pushing him back further than she thought she could. Tears streamed down her face, how could she be so stupid?! Stupid enough to let him in, to let him past the wall she'd built up throughout the years. Loss had happened to her more than she thought anyone could ever take on.  
"You dont get to say you understand! You dont! Dont ever tell me you know, that youll be there! Because you havent! You havent been through the pain, the sorrow, the loneliness. You have no clue how I've gone through these things and come out the way I have." She screamed at him, forgetting to wipe her face of the tears, forgetting to take a deep breath and back away. No she was done, she was broken and she wanted to show him how much damage he had caused.  
Bella could feel the walls breaking around her heart, shattering, walls that would have to be rebuilt again. She could feel hands clawing at her, tearing parts of her soul from her. She didnt want to go through that again. She had said she wouldnt go through it again, but here she was, proving to herself that she was a liar. How could he have pushed her that far, its like he never picked up on it. Paul was always around, how could he not pick up on how fragile she was? She guessed she was better at hiding the pain than she thought she was.  
"LET ME IN THEN! YOU CANT HIDE FROM ME FOREVER!" Paul screamed back. He shocked himself when he yelled. "She cant push me away, it cant happen" he thought to himself.  
"Please...let me in" he whispered.  
"You want in! You want into MY HEAD!? " She screeched. "Fine! You wanna feel someone grabbing at you? Biting you! Pushing at you..." she could hear the mans voice in her head again, meancing, whispering "you've wanted me for so long...your mine now, you wanted this..."  
She shook her head, took a step back, choking on her own breath. Paul watched her back away, he lifted his hand towards her. "Please wait...I'm sorry..."He mumbled.  
"No..."she whispered, trying to breathe through the breaking of her heart. "You don't get to be sorry. Never be sorry. It's my fault I let you in. I never wanted to let you in and here you are. Why do you even care? Because we've been through so much?!" he could hear the panic rising in her voice. Tears streamed down her face again. "I didnt want it to happen. He forced it, not me...but its my fault. Its always my fault! I knew it, it always happens..." Turning away she tried to walk away but couldnt.  
"I'm so sorry I hurt you..." She whispered.  
"Bella..." he reached for her, she whimpered as she took another step back.  
" Paul...I'm sorry. I didnt ask for this...I'm so broken..." she felt her knees give way then. She sat there, moving to lay down and curl into a ball and sobbed. The pain, the worry, the loneliness was back. It crept back into her life while she wasnt looking. Paul walked slowly to her and sunk down near her, but didnt touch her. He knew she couldnt be touched right now, she had to let it all out, she had to do it in her own way, but there was no way he was leaving her. She wouldnt...no, couldnt, understand what she meant to him. Nothing would take that from him, but at this moment he couldnt tell her that. He felt her pain and for once there was nothing he could do. She had obvisiously been through so much more than he ever thought possible and she had let him in, even though she never wanted too. Paul watched as Bella curled into herself again, hugging herself and sobbing, gulping for air. He wasnt leaving, he hoped she knew that.

-

"You dont understand..."she whimpered. Bell had taken a while to be able to just lay there, without the big tears running down her face. She was barely audible to anyone, but paul could hear her.  
" I have always been left. No matter how much love someone has for me...they leave. They talk about me behind my back. I have always closed myself up and then you came along. I never thought I could handle it. I have waited everyday for something to break us apart. It was me." Paul shook his head. "It couldnt be you..."he whispered. She wasnt looking at him. She had been curled away from him the whole time, staring into space.  
" What he did was not your fault...I...I" he stumbled over his words like rocks in a dirt path. "I saw...and I went crazy..." he couldnt form the words into a complete sentence. Images of her being pressed again the black car that night, another man kissing her.  
"But you should have come to me...but he was right you know. I deserved what I got" she could feel her throat tighten, threatening to make her cry again. Paul felt his angry rising. Had that guy actually said that to her!? He started to talk but bella was speaking again.  
" It was all innocent until after the game..." she retreated into her head again, seeing everything again.

-

"Come on hunny..."a husky voice spoke into her ear."I wanna go somewhere else." Bella was bending over the pool table, about to take her next shot. Jack was curled around her, his hands snaking between her legs, grabbing at the fabric that stood between him and what he wanted.  
"Jack...I'm just finishing my game and then I have to go. Let me just make this shot, please" She'd seen him drunk before, knew he was like this but nothing had every happened to her before, why should now be any different? Melissa glared at the back of Bella's head. How was it every guy went after Bella but not her? She rubbed her back against her consolation prize for the night. Tray was alright, but he wasnt Jack and he certainly wasn't Paul. She could have any guy she wanted but she couldnt get Jack...Jack was another morsal she wanted to wrap her mouth around. But they were "just friends", all of them.  
"Fine...but I wanna go somewhere else tonight" Jack growled into Bella's ear.  
"Jack you know I cant go anywhere else tonight" Bella stated as she stood up from her shot. "Beside I need to get Paul from work tonight. And I have appointments and errands all day tomorrow." She swear she saw Jack's lip curl.  
"Fine..." He muttered and walked over to Melissa and tray. "She cant be serious...She's going to miss out on everything because she's dating the school rockstar" he muttered. Melissa could hear the anger in his voice and decided it was her turn to get her way.  
"Why dont you get us another round of shots? I'll talk to Bella, I'm sure I could bring her around" she smiled. "Ill bring her around..."she thought to herself.  
"Bella!" Melissa bellowed as she made her way to the pool table. "Come on, I need to use the bathroom!" She tugged at Bella's arm and began to drag her the bathroom near the backdoor.  
"Fine..." Bella mumbled as she tossed the que on the table. "Good game man..." They both glanced at each other, knowing that with all the interruptions they would never be able to finish the game. He nodded and walked back to the bar.  
Melissa kept babbling and dragging her, but as soon as the door closed behind them she turned and stared Bella in the eyes. "You realize Jack is so totally into you and your not even taking a chance with him!? Whats gotten into you!? And please dont give me any crap about you and paul, cause he's seriously wrecking my mood and he's not even here! I mean come on! Jack Callahan is all over you and all you do is play pool!? What happened to the old Bella? The Bella that had_the_ biggest crush on Jack and would do anything just to be around him? You finally get your chance and your chickening out!" she whined. Bella just stood there amazed that her friend was so upset.  
" You know I'm with paul..."she sputtered out.  
"I know, but for tonight your with me" Melissa pleaded. "Have another shot and then we'll go where ever the party heads" she begged. "Please? I cant go alone!" she pouted, sticking out her lower lip.  
"I need to pick up Paul though, he's been working a lot..." she started when she was cut off "Paul, Paul, Paul! It's always Paul!? What happened to us?! We used to be best friends" guilt would do the trick she thought. "We never get to hang out anymore and when we do he's always around. We get it, you caught the biggest bad boy in town...but your girlfriend is lonely and has no one else she trusts to drink with! Please..."she sighed. "Please, just another drink and I promise I'll let you go back to prince charming." She could see the guilt settling on Bella's shoulders. She ran her fingers through her own inky black hair. She grinned as Bella sighed. "Ok...one shot!" Bella smiled. "Ill call paul and just have him head over here" she pulled out her phone and texted him while melissa squealed, jumping up and down and hugging her. " Thank you!" "I'm not doing it for Jack though, he's really off tonight, I'm staying because you asked and I'm pretty sure you already got us another shot." Bella grinned and looked at her phone

B: Hey, head to the bar after work, Melissa is having a rough time since I'm not around very often...I told her one more shot...I'll be ready to go afterwards. Love you!

As they headed back to the table she could see the shots were already there, at least two rounds...of doubles...Thank goodness they had ordered food before.  
"Ladies! Lets make a toast" Jack said as he snaked his arm around bella and pulled her over to him, even though he felt her tense and try to move away. "To you...to the beautiful ladies that are amazing and I'm so glad your here" he said as he lifted his shot into the air and gulped it back. Bella felt the burn and could tell Paul would be the one driving home...oops, should have told him that. After the second round she could begin to feel the numbness creep over her.  
"Shit..."she looked at her phone for the time "I was supposed to meet paul..."  
3 new messages

P: Yeah I'll be there, dont have too much fun! Haha  
P: Sorry, running a little late...should have been there already...but some stuff needed to be handled.  
P: I'll be there in 15 min, guess I'm driving tonight huh? Haha, cant wait! No puking it the car this time...luv u

Paul would be here any minute and she wasnt out there waiting. "I gotta go" she mumbled and tried to untangle herself from melissa and jacks arms. She couldnt figure out how that had happened, she remembered the toast then now, and hour later they were all in a fit of giggles and hugs and she was pretty sure she and melissa had shared a kiss or two.  
"Aw..."they pouted together. "here!" Jack said "I'll walk you out" she wasnt sure how hed walk her out since he had been the one that was past wasted and was tripping over his own feet. "Meh...whatever" Bella said as she gathered her purse. She could feel jack putting his arm around her shoulders and putting his weight against her. "offh!" she said as she struggled to walk to the door with this bulky guy leaning on her. "You should call a cab" she told him as they stepped out in the cool night breeze. "Nah..."he mumbled. "Walk me to my car? Please" jack tugged at her hand..."No...I need to wait for Paul" Bella looked around, Melissa and Tray had followed them. "Tray's driving...I just wanna hold your hand some...-hiccup- more" jack said. "Come on you wuss!" Melissa said as she laughed and pulled closer to Tray. She could feel herself moving, but not without resistance. They reached tray's black car and she opened the door for Jack. "K, your here!" She tried to pull away but jack held her fast. "Wait..." he said as he pulled her closer. "I wanna kiss you."  
"That would be a bad idea" she said as she pulled away, she could feel his arms wrap around her. She had to get out of there, had to. There was no way this could be happening.  
"You've wanted me for so long...your mine now, you wanted this..." he hissed and clamped his mouth over hers. She tried to scream but couldnt, she tried to twist away but he held her steadfast. He released her mouth and grinned, an evil, menacing grin. "No...I dont want you, I mean I did but that was so long ago." she whimpered, she needed to move. "Melissa help!" She gave her friend a pleading look. "No way" melissa shook her head. "You wanted him, you got him, you deserve it" Bella could feel the fear rising in her chest. Jack forced his lips on hers again, she bit down hard on his bottom lip,tasting the metallic taste of blood. "You bitch!" He screamed and threw her against the door. He grabbed her shoulders and shook her, turning her and slamming against the door frame. Bella grunted "Please just stop, this isnt you." He smacked her across the face. "Your going to get in the car and your going to like what I do. You deserve to get what youve always wanted" Jack started shoving her into the car. He grabbed her face and forced another kiss on her. In her head she was yelling, screaming for Paul. Where was he?! She pushed at Jack, he just pressed against her, she tried to bite him again but he bit back.

"Hey! What the FUCK is going on!?" Paul yelled. Was she kissing him!? Jack turned and grinned, wiping his mouth with his sleeves. "Whats up Paul? You wanna join?" Jack released Bella and shoved her out of the way, turning his entire body to face paul. "We're just headed to another party." He smiled. "Bella was just thanking me for the shots...we had a helluva night, to bad you couldnt join us Lahote." Paul was only seeing red. Something wasnt right. He could see Bella was frightened. He stomped over to the car. Jack was one of his closest friends until he transferred out to another school. "What the hell?"  
You could hear the crack throughout the parking lot. "You broke my nose!" Jack wailed as he clutched his face. " You broke my nose for that stupid bitch!? What the hell! She aint worth it...she asked for it!" You could hear another crack as paul punch him across the face.

-

"You didnt deserve anything he did to you" he growled through gritted teeth. Why wouldnt she face him. He needed to see her face, he inched closer to her, still not touching her.  
"I had liked him for a long time...but then you came along...They had been around longer than you. He played with me, like a toy." She scrunched herself up tighter. "How could my own friends do that to me?" She could feel the tears rising. She licked the bite mark on her bottom lip and sucked in a breath.  
" They arent your friends...not if they're like that to you" he said soothingly. "Im sorry...I'm sorry I wasnt there. I'm sorry I've been staying away." he reached out to touch her back, he needed to feel her. She rolled to face him, her eyes swollen from the tears, bags under her eyes from not sleeping for the past couple of days. Pain was etched across her face, pain that he hadnt been there, that he had broken his promise. Pain that she hadnt been smart enough to stop those events from happening.  
" I was so blind..." she whispered...she felt the tears build up and fall over, down her cheeks, they were hot...if only tears could burn a trail...


	4. Let the music explain

Paul watched her climb up into the bed of the truck, crossing his arms over his broad chest, a grin threatening to escape from his lips. The music was jamming on the beach and watching Bella having fun finally made him feel better. He watched her hips saw, her own cut of shorts covering her bikini bottom. It had been her idea to gather at the beach, to get their friends together, it had been a while but who was he to say no to her? Keeping his eyes trained on her he watched as Bella helped pull Kim and emily up to the tailgate, all of them laughing.

"Paul!" She yelled "turn it up! I love this song!" tippin' point was her new jam and he'd be damned if he would be the one to ruin her mood. He walked over to the stereo, turning up the music even louder than before, he laughed watching the girls move their hips together, grinding against each other, he laughed when he turned to see the boys watching the guys, whooping and hollering.

"Yeah baby! Shake it!"

_It's hot as hell the way you shake that tailgate  
You make me wanna holler at the moon_

He watched bella laugh, throwing her head back, she hadn't been this relaxed in weeks. Slowly she untied the white shirt that was covering her bikini top and threw it at the ground. Shaking her hips she slithered down between Kim and emily.

_You shake those hips, hips, hips, that body  
Your curves have got me swervin' and drivin' me crazy_

"Go baby Go!" he hear Sam shout. _This was definitely a good idea._ Finally, paul let the smile that had been hiding all morning slide forward and almost split his face in half. He walked back to the boys, laughing, high fiving each other and sat down, pulling another beer out of the cooler.

When the song ended they hopped off the tailgate. Jared was there to help kim down, always the one to be a gentlman, sam pulling emily to him by the hand, kissing her, whispering how she was so sexy, bella walked over to paul.

"Thank you" she smiled, leaning over paul, nudging herself so she could stand between his legs, she lowered her lips to his, gently touching them together.

"Anything for you babe" he smiled back, welcoming the kiss, feeling a small tingle go down his spine, his girl back and here with him, like nothing had happened. They made it through everything and he'd do anything to bring back the smile that brightened his dark days. Bella pulled the beer out of paul's hand and sipped it, wrinkling her nose, she hated how miller lite tasted, but it didnt matter. Laughing, paul pulled the beer back, "well don't drink it if you dont like it!" he pulled her to his lap and hugged her close. No one had noticed the sun had started to set, or the fact that Quil and Embry had helped to build up the bonfire.

Bella sighed, wrapping her arms around paul's strong neck. She loved nights like this, being curled into him, the sun setting, painting the sky a different color every night. She watched the clouds turn a bright pink, reminding her of cotton candy. She could see the dark purple start to fall down the sky, like a blanket covering the world, tucking it in for another night. None of the pack turned to turn off the music as it changed its beat.

_If you ever leave me, baby,  
Leave some morphine at my door  
'Cause it would take a whole lot of medication  
To realize what we used to have,  
We don't have it anymore._

Bella pulled herself closer, burying her head deeper into paul's neck. She had tried to leave him, but he stayed with her, through everything. She could feel his breath tickle her ear as he spoke into her ear, only speaking to her, reminding her that he would be there, always.

"Its ok" he whispered. "I'll be all the morphine you'll ever need. I'm never leaving you, never again will you be lonely."


	5. Saying Goodbye

Bella stared blankly at her laptop screen, fingers bracing on the keyboard as she tried to gather her thoughts even so she could let them flow down her arms, to her fingertips and out onto the screen. How would she be able to say what she was really feeling? She hadn't let anyone know, hell she had hidden it from herself. She closed her eyes tightly against the burn in her eyes, hoping to keep the tears back, never wanting them to fall, yet she braced herself for impact.

_She remembered looking into paul's eyes, seeing the pain, the cold steel of emotion that he was trying to hold back from her. He couldnt hide things like this from her, she knew instantly. The two and half months of stalling, the pain that seemed to ebb and flow freely throughout her family, it was all coming to and end, and somehow, in a sick way, she was lucky he was there, he was going to be the one to watch her crack and fall to pieces. She felt the numbness wash over her, her legs turned to a thick gooey jello like substance but yet they helped her stay standing. She braced for impact, braced herself for the words that were going to come and hit her like a ton of bricks. She knew it was over...but she didn't want it to be this way. She had told her self over and over that is was over, it was over before it began. She even allowed herself a little hope when things started to shine brightly again. The phones, the emails, the updates, everything, it seemed like everything was getting better...but here...here and now she knew it wasnt and that it wasn't ever going to be she was going to face it and how she would take the reality...she didnt know just yet, so she waited, waited for the official words to tumble from his mouth._

_ "I'm sorry, she's gone" his voice was low, monotone. His voice was usually strong, usually pulled her from her darkest places, but this time it was his voice that was going to help plunge her deep into a dark abyss that she only hoped she was strong enough to come out of. _

_ Two and half months of prayers, of fighting, of her faith being shaken...it was all over now. Paul stepped forward and brought her against his chest, she hadnt moved to him and he knew he would have to move to take care of her. _

_"I know" was all she said before she stepped out of his embrace, turned and walked to the porch. Paul watched, waiting for the tears, but instead it was worse, she was a stone wall and no emotion was going to get through. All he could do was follow her and wait for inevitable._

Bella opened her eyes again and stared again at the empty screen. She thought about emailing her cousin, but it didn't feel right. Her husband and the rest of her family would be able to read the email or any messages she sent, she needed to get out what she was feeling but wasnt sure how to go about delivering any of the messages. She poised her fingers and decided to just let go of everything and to write freely.

Dear Kendra-

-The tears threatened Bella's eyes again.-

Im sorry I wasnt there. I look at your pictures from time to time, look at your daughter and think of you. Shes beautiful you know, she has everyone wrapped around her finger and so many people rooting for her already. Her life will be a full one.

-grimacing, Bella took a deep breath-

I wanted to write you...to tell you Im sorry I wasnt there. Maybe there was something I could have done. Why didn't God take me instead? I dont understand it. We've already had enough pain in this family. I blame myself. I catch myself wanting to call you or write you. You were so happy and I finally felt like we were going to be friends. I know we were never close but it kills me that your gone. I have times when I dont think of whats happened, but then I feel guilty. I try to live my life better now, enjoy it more. I started writing again but for a while I was really depressed. I havent been to your grave yet. Can you forgive me? Ill go, but Im not ready yet. Im not ready to be near where your buried.

-A tear fell down Bellas cheek, she took a slow steady breath-

I dont know what I should say. I just wanted to tell you how much I miss you. I always looked up to you and lets be honest, I still do. My cousin was beautiful, she danced gracefully and sang. I always loved dancing and I know you did too, but you really loved singing and if I was good at it I wish we could have sang together. I still remember you singing at memaw's funeral. You sang the same song at your friends wedding, I wish you could sing at my wedding.

-Bella could feel her chest opening a little, like a small bit of relief was coming.-

I miss you so much and I wish...I wish so many things. I'm not admitting that your gone...it still hurts too much. I still reach for my phone to call you but then remember I cant. I feel like I didnt do enough, didnt pray enough, I should have come down there.

-Bella stopped. She could feel the courage slipping away, the words retreating up her arms and back to her mind. She couldnt think clearly. She'd have to try again later to express herself. Saving the letter she picked up her phone and decided to text paul.

**I love you, to the moon and back. **


	6. Baby Fever

"May I?" Bella beamed as she walked over to her friend Casey.

"Sure" Casey said as she handed the blanket buddled baby to her close friend. It had been about a month since they had seen each other but she knew Bella would love the baby time she got with alexander. Not that Bella wanted children now, but baby fever had set in since most of her friend were either pregnant or just had babies, it just wasnt her time. Paul was gone a lot for work, but that didnt mean Bella couldnt have her baby time and go back "normal" after, so to speak.

Cooing at alexander, bella craddle him closely. She watched him yawn but keep his eyes closed. "Hows he been?" she asked as she and her friend started to walk around campus.

"Eh...he sleeps most of the time. Except at night. He eats a lot...normal baby stuff." Casey shrugged her shoulders and readjusted the diaper bag.

"How are you?" Bella asked, craddling alexander closer.

"Good, tired...glad to be out of the house."

They walked down to the cafeteria, still chatting away and sat at a table. "Im going to get a drink, are you ok with alexander till then?" questioned casey. Bella nodded and kept her eyes on the baby. He slowly blinked his eyes as Casey walked away.

"Hey there little guy..." cooing, bella bounced the baby softly. Suddenly he began to cry, nothing huge but enough to shock bella. "Aw...whats wrong? Hungry? Need a diaper change" bella rattled off a list of things even though she knew he couldnt answer.

"Try the paci" casey called over. "In the pocket on the front." Smirking Casey walked over, dug through the bag and handed Bella the pacifier.

"Thanks" rubbing the pacifier against alexander's lips until he opened his mouth and took the pacifier and began to suck at it. Smiling, casey watched her friend hold her son.

"You know...your next" Casey laughed. Bella's head shot up, eyes wide with shock.

"Wha-...No...Paul isnt ready, I'm not ready." Casey laughed as she watch her friend babble and come up with excuses as to why she wasn't ready or didnt want children. "Oh calm down ya nut! I was just saying, you have baby fever and if you could you'd probably try to get pregnant. Paul isn't even here, so theres no way it would happen. For now...you could settle for helping with alexander...get your baby fever under control and not freak paul out every time he sees you with a baby." Casey shook her head and laughed again. Bella shrugged, looking into alexanders blue eyes, leaned forward and placed a gentle kiss on top of his head.


End file.
